For many, C.S. Lewis is the pinnacle of the faithful Christian, a person who dedicated much of his life to explaining Christian ideas and the defense of the Christian lifestyle. For many still, whether through his expert defense of the faith in Mere Christianity, his damning examination of sin in The Screwtape Letters, his moving allegories for the faith in The Chronicles of Narnia, or one of his many other explorations of the Christian life, C.S. Lewis helped to bring them to the faith.

Lewis’ account of his childhood up through his intellectual maturation shows us that, even for a person like the one that Lewis became, the journey of faith is not a straight line, nor is it a short one. Just as Lewis converted many non-believers to the faith through his writing, at one point, Lewis was in dire need of conversion himself. From the beginning of his religious life, he was a Christian by rote more than anything else — a cultural Christian. He participated in the duties and celebrated the holidays, but he knew no deeper spiritual experience than those.

For a moment, Lewis’ Christian spirit rose up, and during his time at boarding school, he became a genuinely devout Christian, praying, studying, and practicing his faith in the company of faithful mentors. After an unfortunate series of spiritual struggles and personal and literary encounters, the seeds of doubt began to loom large in Lewis’ mind. As his increasingly pretentious and rationalist mind developed throughout his teens, a newfound atheism became more and more pronounced and rigid.

Still, even from this deep hole, Lewis would emerge a Christian only a few short years later. After several encounters with Joy, some influential friends and professors, and some crucial readings of Yeats, MacDonald, and Chesterton, Lewis shed his intellectual preference for atheism and materialism in favor of Christianity. Do not be discouraged when your friends, family members, or fellow Christians experience struggles with their faith — Lewis’ story demonstrates that finding one’s faith is a highly personal process, in equal parts self-discovery and intellectual and emotional exploration.